Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Randomize
