Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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