spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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