Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Randomize
