you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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