I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
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