get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
