it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Randomize
