do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
