It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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