You made me cry and you don't even care
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
