I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
And the cops told us we were all naked.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Randomize
