Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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