I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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