Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Randomize
