I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Randomize
