Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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