I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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