He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
COCAINE IS GR8
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
