I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
