Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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