I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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