How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
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