i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
