I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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