my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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