it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
the liver wants what the liver wants
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
