id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
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