I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
