brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
