I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
