Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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