I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
too bad you live with your parents still
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
