So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
