It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize
