You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
