Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Randomize
