He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
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