Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
