My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Randomize
