Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Randomize
