i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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