We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I have tasted many bathrooms
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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