you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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