She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
