Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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