if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Your cock deserves a montage
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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