He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
