Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
