No stitches, just platelets and will power
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
two words...techno handjob
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
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